ACTIVATE youth ministry

"Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us." 2 Timothy 3:17

One of the scriptures I read this morning was Proverbs 29:9, “A sage trying to work things out with a fool gets only scorn and sarcasm for his trouble.”

I looked up the word “sage” and found this…

1. A profoundly wise person; a person famed for wisdom.
2. Someone venerated for the possession of wisdom, judgment, and experience.

Ok, so if a sage is all of those things, it’s fair to assume their approach in “working things out” with someone would be near flawless. Probably calm, well thought out, communicated in love, and above all else, right on the money. So why in the world would this other person, this fool, respond with scorn and sarcasm?! I mean who does that?! Who freaks out on a sage?! Who is scornful and sarcastic with someone who is known for their wisdom, experience, and judgement? What a perfect word for a person lik that. A fool!

My brain was flooded with names of people who were fools according to this definition. People who scorned me and my correction/advice. How underappreciated I am sometimes. Table for self-pity, party of 1

Then my brain shifted gears, thankfully, and I had to admit, I play the fool quite a bit to when it comes to people trying to”work things out” with me. I respond with scorn, and sarcasm at times. However I instantly begin to defend myself and say think that when I play the “fool” I’m justified and it’s warranted because the person “working things out” with me isn’t exactly a sage, and their approach is all wrong, so my scorn and sarcasm should be easily overlooked and almost allowed or expected by them. Sound familiar?

I believe alot of us fall into this trap. We feel our scorn and sarcasm are ok because the person talking to us, is too emotional, or upset, or whatever. If they would have been nicer, or said things differently, we would have responded much better. Really? Is that a fair expectation to put on someone? Is it fair to expect people to be sages? Why do we as people put such high expectations on other people, but lower them for ourselves?! I know I’m far from a sage when it comes to my approach when attempting to “work things out” with others, and would be offended and immediately dismiss someone if they told me they expected me to be sage like in my “working things out” approach with them. On the otherside though, I justify my rudeness towards others because the person isn’t sage like in their approach to “working things out” with me? Human nature is so pretty isn’t it?!

Aren’t all of us nowhere near being a sage?! I should be more than willing to admit I’m not profoundly wise, I’m not famed for my wisdom, I’m not venerated for having wisdom, judgement and experience. I also have to admit at times, in a way I almost expect others to be sage like when dealing with me. This isn’t always the case. I’m not always ready to admit any of that. Why? Probably in an effort to feel better about my shortcomings, I’m comparing myself to others. I search high and wide for people who I think I’m better at “working things out” than. It’s an all to common response when we have done something wrong, and begin to feel badly about it. We seek out anything to make us feel better about us, and oftentimes that’s seeing someone else who is worse at it thatn we are, in our humble opinions anyway. All of us can find someone who we’re smarter than, or calmer than or whatever and as a result, we instantly feel better about where we’re at. How shallow we can be sometimes. The truth is, our standard is not, and should never be someone else. Our standard is and should be God. Look at what the bible says about us and God’s standard: Romans 3:23 says, “We all fall short of God’s glorious standard.” Notice God doesn’t get into the details of falling short. he doesn’t say some fall shorter than others, or some are better than others. Nope, we all fall short. We’re the ones who try and determine who’s further from God’s standard, but all God wants us to see at the end of the day, is that we’ve all fallen short.

Would my response really change, if the person’s approach and method of “working things out” with me was flawless, almost sage like? Doubtful. I play the fool, we all do sometimes. We have to be willing to admit our flaws, not hide them behind someone else’s. Proverbs 28:13 says, “You can’t whitewash your own sins and get by with it; you find mercy by admitting and leaving them.”

Here’s to admitting I fall short of God’s standard. Here’s to admitting I play the fool, no matter how well someone approached “working things out” with me. Here’s to admitting my constant need for Him in my life. Here’s to no longer allowing my responses, and my character, to be manipulated, inlfuenced, or controlled by someone else, my emotions, or my hurt feelings. Here’s to consistency in being willing to admit my sins, and leave them behind as  walk in Jesus’ direction. James 4:8, “As we draw near to God, He draws near to us.”